Shel, Nan, Shel, Nan

The title might seem funny but this is the way Shel and I have acknowledged each other, whether it be in person or on the phone. I don't know why we do this but we've done it for years. And she's never called me Nancy, always "Nan". Even when she emails me about something that's "touched" her in some way, the subject of the email is always "Nannnnnnnn" which usually alerts me to the fact that this is going to be a "from the heart" email from Shel. During my "out of commission August", I missed many blog posts I wanted to write, one of which was about my friend Shel whose birthday was on August 16th. That date, August 16th, has played such a big role in my life as it's not only Shelley's birthday but also my wedding anniversary. And, readers of this blog now know that August 16th is also the birthday of the newest addition to our family, our grandson, Brady Robert.

Shel is one of the infamous eight BFON, aka Best Friends of Nancy. Other than my two high school friends, she is one of my oldest and dearest. She also holds a very unique distinction....she was my first Jewish friend. This might be an odd thing to say but, having grown up in Irish/Polish/Italian Brooklyn and going to twelve years of Catholic schools, I had never even met a Jewish person until I met Shelley. It all came about when the guy I was dating (and later married and divorced) played ice hockey for Queens College. He became friends with another ice hockey player who happened to be Shelley's boyfriend. While they became best friends, so did Shelley and I. And boy, do I love her. Every single minute with Shel was fun. I put these pictures in here because her smile and laugh is the same now as it was forty years ago. And she also introduced me to a life I had never known before.

Born Shelley Mehr and growing up in Syosset on Long Island, Shelley had a way of life that was unusual to me since I had grown up in Brooklyn. She had a big beautiful house on Long Island with a big green yard while I was used to living in a railroad apartment in Brooklyn with no yard. She also had a Jewish mother, Ro, and a teddy bear of a Jewish father, Bernie. They were unlike any two people I had ever met. Ro called me Bubala and I always thought she was the one to term the phrase, "Oy Vey". I remember the first time I slept over their house and they put out this orange fish for breakfast with bagels....and a little tuna salad on the side. I didn't eat it then and I still don't now but it was my first introduction to bagels and lox. I loved being at Shelley's house because it was always so happy and welcoming. They actually wanted me there and they let me know it. I remember Shelley's father dying very suddenly and, everytime I think of Bernie, tears still come to my eyes because, at the time, I looked upon her father as someone as wonderful as mine and that's quite a compliment. This entry wouldn't be complete without a picture of Ro and then another picture of three generations which includes Ro with her two daughters and her grandaughter on her wedding day. You just know that Bernie is looking down on all of them and smiling thinking about how beautiful they all are.

Dating ice hockey players wasn't always the most fun thing to do. It meant late nights in cold rinks and New Year's Eve's spent at Madison Square Garden watching the NY Rangers play. One time, we were all going back to Shelley's house after the game and had parked our car in NYC on the street. We were so happy to find a spot but this happiness was short-lived as the car was broken into while we were at the game and things from my luggage were stolen. I say "things" because the thieves actually went through the suitcase and only took what they wanted. I remember losing my favorite pair of jeans that day. It's funny the things you remember.

Shel eventually moved to New Jersey and married Rick (not from our ice hockey days) and had two beautiful children....Carrie and David. We definitely don't see each other as much as we'd like to (my fault) but we catch up with phone calls and emails as much as we can. When Michael used to play away ice hockey games at South Mountain Arena in New Jersey, Shel would always make an effort to come and watch him play so we could relive those "golden" days in the cold rinks.

I know she'll be reading this as she's the Livingston, New Jersey city that appears on my blog counter. When she does read it, I want her to know how much she has meant to me in my life. I know I joke and say she was my first Jewish friend but I'm actually her first non-Jewish friend and, to this day, she still sends me a St. Patrick's Day card to honor my Irish heritage. I know she actually gets a kick out of the fact that she's going into a card store and buying a St. Patrick's Day card and I can actually see her laughing as she does it. The card is always addressed to Nan at my address.....never a last name, only Nan. And, too, her cards from me are just addressed as Shel. This picture just shows that you're as beautiful now as you were back then. I think here you're trying to tell me that you used your favorite mode of transportation.......in other words, "you came on the bus." (an inside joke dear blog readers).

So Shel, even though I missed calling you on your special day and sent your card out very late, I want you to know that I was thinking about you on that day. You are one of the most special people in my life and always will be. I will never forget the years of fun we had and how we got each other through the trials and tribulations of dating. I think back on our days together with only happiness and thank the day I dated a guy who went to Queens College so I could meet a nice Jewish girl like you from Long Island.

A very belated Happy Birthday to you. Love, Nan, Shel, Nan, Shel