Shel, Nan, Shel, Nan

The title might seem funny but this is the way Shel and I have acknowledged each other, whether it be in person or on the phone. I don't know why we do this but we've done it for years. And she's never called me Nancy, always "Nan". Even when she emails me about something that's "touched" her in some way, the subject of the email is always "Nannnnnnnn" which usually alerts me to the fact that this is going to be a "from the heart" email from Shel. During my "out of commission August", I missed many blog posts I wanted to write, one of which was about my friend Shel whose birthday was on August 16th. That date, August 16th, has played such a big role in my life as it's not only Shelley's birthday but also my wedding anniversary. And, readers of this blog now know that August 16th is also the birthday of the newest addition to our family, our grandson, Brady Robert.

Shel is one of the infamous eight BFON, aka Best Friends of Nancy. Other than my two high school friends, she is one of my oldest and dearest. She also holds a very unique distinction....she was my first Jewish friend. This might be an odd thing to say but, having grown up in Irish/Polish/Italian Brooklyn and going to twelve years of Catholic schools, I had never even met a Jewish person until I met Shelley. It all came about when the guy I was dating (and later married and divorced) played ice hockey for Queens College. He became friends with another ice hockey player who happened to be Shelley's boyfriend. While they became best friends, so did Shelley and I. And boy, do I love her. Every single minute with Shel was fun. I put these pictures in here because her smile and laugh is the same now as it was forty years ago. And she also introduced me to a life I had never known before.

Born Shelley Mehr and growing up in Syosset on Long Island, Shelley had a way of life that was unusual to me since I had grown up in Brooklyn. She had a big beautiful house on Long Island with a big green yard while I was used to living in a railroad apartment in Brooklyn with no yard. She also had a Jewish mother, Ro, and a teddy bear of a Jewish father, Bernie. They were unlike any two people I had ever met. Ro called me Bubala and I always thought she was the one to term the phrase, "Oy Vey". I remember the first time I slept over their house and they put out this orange fish for breakfast with bagels....and a little tuna salad on the side. I didn't eat it then and I still don't now but it was my first introduction to bagels and lox. I loved being at Shelley's house because it was always so happy and welcoming. They actually wanted me there and they let me know it. I remember Shelley's father dying very suddenly and, everytime I think of Bernie, tears still come to my eyes because, at the time, I looked upon her father as someone as wonderful as mine and that's quite a compliment. This entry wouldn't be complete without a picture of Ro and then another picture of three generations which includes Ro with her two daughters and her grandaughter on her wedding day. You just know that Bernie is looking down on all of them and smiling thinking about how beautiful they all are.

Dating ice hockey players wasn't always the most fun thing to do. It meant late nights in cold rinks and New Year's Eve's spent at Madison Square Garden watching the NY Rangers play. One time, we were all going back to Shelley's house after the game and had parked our car in NYC on the street. We were so happy to find a spot but this happiness was short-lived as the car was broken into while we were at the game and things from my luggage were stolen. I say "things" because the thieves actually went through the suitcase and only took what they wanted. I remember losing my favorite pair of jeans that day. It's funny the things you remember.

Shel eventually moved to New Jersey and married Rick (not from our ice hockey days) and had two beautiful children....Carrie and David. We definitely don't see each other as much as we'd like to (my fault) but we catch up with phone calls and emails as much as we can. When Michael used to play away ice hockey games at South Mountain Arena in New Jersey, Shel would always make an effort to come and watch him play so we could relive those "golden" days in the cold rinks.

I know she'll be reading this as she's the Livingston, New Jersey city that appears on my blog counter. When she does read it, I want her to know how much she has meant to me in my life. I know I joke and say she was my first Jewish friend but I'm actually her first non-Jewish friend and, to this day, she still sends me a St. Patrick's Day card to honor my Irish heritage. I know she actually gets a kick out of the fact that she's going into a card store and buying a St. Patrick's Day card and I can actually see her laughing as she does it. The card is always addressed to Nan at my address.....never a last name, only Nan. And, too, her cards from me are just addressed as Shel. This picture just shows that you're as beautiful now as you were back then. I think here you're trying to tell me that you used your favorite mode of transportation.......in other words, "you came on the bus." (an inside joke dear blog readers).

So Shel, even though I missed calling you on your special day and sent your card out very late, I want you to know that I was thinking about you on that day. You are one of the most special people in my life and always will be. I will never forget the years of fun we had and how we got each other through the trials and tribulations of dating. I think back on our days together with only happiness and thank the day I dated a guy who went to Queens College so I could meet a nice Jewish girl like you from Long Island.

A very belated Happy Birthday to you. Love, Nan, Shel, Nan, Shel

Back Amongst the Living

Well, after a little more than four weeks, I think I see some light at the end of the tunnel. For the past two days, I've had no pain at all. After finishing the first steroid pack, the pain did start to return a bit. Since my appointment with my spine specialist isn't until Wednesday, my doctor decided to put me on another steroid pack to get me through the weekend just in case the pain came back to its full intensity. After two days of being on the new steroid pack, the pain has disappeared. Thank the Lord.

I did get back the results from the MRI I had earlier in the week. It showed that the L3 disk fragmented and was resting on a nerve.....so a piece of the disk broke off and found a new home on the nerve. That's why there was no position I could put myself in to get any kind of relief. After reading the MRI report, my doctor said he didn't know how I had made it through the past three weeks and I think this is why he opted for the second steroid pack. Whatever his reasoning, I'm happy he did because it's such a relief to wake up in the morning with no pain. I feel so sorry now for all those people in the world who live in pain every day with no relief in sight.

But, I'm not out of the woods yet as I have to see what has to be done to fix this. My doctor wants me to see a neurosurgeon which I will do after seeing my spine specialist on Wednesday. One thing I did learn throughout this entire ordeal is never to self-medicate myself again. During a two week period, I think I went through three bottles of Motrin and two bottles of Extra Strength Excedrin. By the time I went to the emergency room last week, between all the drugs I was on and all the pain I was in, my blood pressure was at 210....I don't know what the bottom number was but I do know that they immediately put me on blood pressure medication which I'm still on. I never even knew your blood pressure could get that high. And Aunt Margie, if you're reading this, please don't relate this part to my mother because it will elevate her blood pressure. lol

So in my new found painfree life what have I done? I walked my dog yesterday and today while listening to my Ipod. It was like old times. I made dinner last night which I haven't done in a month. I also made Michael chocolate chip cookies to bring with him on his car ride to Newport, Rhode Island where he went for the weekend. Simple things but things that brought much satisfaction and joy.

I also wanted to mention that Bryan, better known by blog readers as FSIL (Favorite Son In Law), asked me not to blog while I was in pain because it was just too sad to read.

So, all I can say is thank you for the past two days.

What I Would Like!!!

Right about now, I think I'd just like one day without this stupid pain in my leg. It's 22 days now and I'm at the end of my rope. I've been to the hospital twice already, the last time this past Tuesday when they gave me a painkiller intravenously. Now I understand addiction to drugs because it was so good not to feel any pain while it lasted. Unfortunately, they sent me home with more percocet which just knocks me out and how long can you continue to live like that. I saw my family doctor on Wednesday who gave me a steroid pack which he assured me would work. I've been on it for four days and still no relief.

On Tuesday, I finally get an MRI which I'm sure will show it's a disc problem. But my appointment with my back doctor isn't until 9/3 because he's on vacation. And even when I see him on 9/3, I'm sure it will be a few more days after that before he can schedule me for a shot which I hope will get rid of this.

Thursday was Michael's birthday and it's the first birthday I didn't even give him a present which makes me feel awful. Today he's at Liz and Bryan's house celebrating his birthday with his new nephew, who I haven't seen since he was born. So I guess that's making me feel more miserable that I couldn't be there with them.

So what I would like is.......

.....to be able to read a book
.....to be able to cook something so I could eat
.....to be able to walk my dog
.....to be able to type more things for my blog since I'm so behind
.....to be able to go to work (can't believe I'm typing that)
.....just to be able to get out of bed would suffice

All these things you take for granted and, when you're in such debilitating pain, you can't even do the simplest things. So my heart now goes out to anyone who has to live like this on a daily basis. At least I know that I can get relief when I finally see my doctor. There's plenty of people out there that don't even have that hope.

1:36AM

AUGUST 21, 1984 @ 1:36AM my world changed......the happiest day of my life.

HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY TO OUR DARLING BOY!!!!

At his christening.....3 months old.

His first birthday....I remember it was pouring outside that day but we still had fun inside.

This was the day that we knew for sure he was a lefty.....his father's dream come true.

And now here he is all grown up at a family wedding.

Unfortunately, I'm still under the weather so I'm not able to type a lot. I think Michael would consider this a fortunate thing for him. But I just want to wish the happiest birthday ever to the best son a mother could ever have. I love you Michael.

9:09AM

Don't have time to post an entire blog entry but just wanted to share this news.....

He's arrived --

Brady Robert Love born August 16, 2008 at 9:09AM weighing 8 lbs. 6 oz. and 21" long. I might also mention that this was our anniversary present from Bryan and Liz as today is our 28th wedding anniversary. Here's the first picture I took of him....hoping his other grandparents (Bryan's Mom and Dad and Stepmom) get to see this because I'm not sure when Bryan will get on his computer to send them the photos as Liz won't let him leave her side.

I'll write more on this later.

Crappy Birthday to Me

Yes, you guessed right. In the midst of all this ruined vacation and awful leg pain, today is my birthday. As the song goes, It's My Party and I'll Cry If I Want To.....and that's exactly what I'm going to do today because I'm still "Les Miserables". I just can't believe that I can't get any relief from this misery. Trying to get an appointment with my specialist is another nightmare. Two calls to his office on Friday weren't even returned.

Added to this already existing nightmare is a job that you can never be free from for even one day. Last night at 9PM, I finalized a huge deal (which could only mean more gifts for the baby to come), only to get a call at 9AM this morning telling me that it all might be falling apart. These things happen all the time but come on........does it have to happen on my birthday? So from 9AM until at least 1PM, I was on the phone trying to save this deal from extinction. I still don't know if I was successful or not but I'll know by tomorrow morning.

People are telling me that my blog doesn't even sound like me anymore. I'm beginning to think it's kind of funny at this point. There's nothing I can do but continue to be in pain until I can get in to see the doctor and get a shot. There's nothing I can do about my once a year special day that will now go down in history as my worst birthday ever. There's nothing I can do about work because what will happen will happen no matter what I do. So I'll just keep on blogging in total misery until I'm without pain. That's all there is to it.

My ever faithful brother Kelly did send me a nice surprise....a $125 gift card to The Borgata Hotel in Atlantic City to be used at any of their restaurants or spas. Michael is buying me a new cell phone as soon as I'm well enough to go shopping for it with him. My brother Bobby called and is getting me a new addition to my Christmas In The City village. My girlfriend Paula from high school sent me a funny ecard this morning. My girlfriend JoAnn wrote about me and my birthday in her blog. My girlfriend Nance sent me a nice card. I'm not home to get any of my other cards but I'm sure there are a few there. Bob was supposed to be buying me a new Louis Vuitton bag but, at the last minute, the one I thought was black turned out to be purple so that's on hold now. So other than that, I'm also "giftless in Avalon" on my birthday. It's the first birthday in my entire life that I didn't have a present to open.

Well, there's still four hours left in this miserable day. Perhaps the baby will be born and that will be the best present ever. Oh wait......it can't be today. I'm in too much pain to get there.

So it's only 365 days until next August 10th, I hope it will be a better birthday than this one was.

Sleepless in Avalon

Why sleepless you might ask? Because the pain in my leg hasn't gone away and it's especially bad at night when it's time to go to bed. This just seems to compound the problem. I spent Tuesday in the emergency room at Shore Memorial Hospital trying to see if I could find a doctor suitable enough to tell me what the problem is. After five hours, they said it's tendonitis. I've never been to medical school and even I know it's not tendonitis. But they had to make sure that they scared me while I was there. They did some blood work and saw something that was elevated in the test which might indicate a blood clot. That necessitated an ultrasound which was done in the cardiac/vascular wing of the hospital. When they were wheeling me in there (I wanted to walk; they insisted on the wheelchair) and I saw those words, I didn't like the feel of them. Well, my blood flow was fine so I left there not knowing any more than I did when I arrived. I did get a prescription for percocet which I haven't even taken yet because I'm afraid it will make me sick.

Bryan (my FSIL) thinks that my last blog entry was quite funny because all I did was complain. Based on that, he should be doubled over with laughter after reading this one. I just think it stinks that I go away on vacation and my vacation is ruined because I can't do anything because of the pain. Everyone is at the beach right now and here I am typing something for my blog.

Still no news of the baby.....he's definitely not ready to face this world. He probably knows that his grandmother is miserable and he'd rather wait until I'm in a better mood to welcome him into this world before he decides to make his entry.

The good news is that Michael and his friends are having a great time. There's a few bars down here that are quite busy any day of the week. Some have karoke and some have beer pong contests. Last night, they had quite a party of their own here before they even went out. Oh to be so young again without a care in the world and without any "pain in your leg". Here's a great picture that I took of them right before they headed out to dinner the other night. The sun is setting in the background and you can see the reflection in the bay. That's Kyle from Nebraska on the left, followed by Chris from Maryland and Steve from California and then Michael.....from all points around the world.

I'm also sitting here looking at all the books I brought with me to be read while sitting on the beach. So, since I can't sit on the beach, they're all still sitting here waiting for a reader. Could I be any more miserable? I don't think so. One more week of vacation and then I can go home and be in pain. Hopefully, by that time I'll be able to get an appointment with my spine specialist who will give me a shot relieving me from my misery.

So Bryan, was this one funny enough for you????

At the Shore -- Week One

Well, we're here at the shore and there's a lot to report. We've been here nine days and, so far, the weather hasn't been great. I really don't mind that as we're here for three weeks and I don't expect everyday to be a beach day. Friday was the first day I woke up and the sun was shining so off to the beach we went. Unfortunately, it was a land breeze which means there are green flies at the beach biting your ankles. It's really not fun. Then it was nice on Sunday but really windy at the beach. Anyone who knows me well knows that there's one thing I can't stand when I'm sitting at the beach and that's the wind.

So enough complaining from me. Despite the weather, it's been great fun. Michael has had a number of friends here...poker friends Chris and Jesse and college friends Matt, Laura, Rachel (and her boyfriend Joe) and Jen who is also Michael's high school friend as well. Liz and Bryan were also here this weekend and this was the last time I will probably see her before she gives birth.

Speaking of her giving birth, she's not due until August 20th yet she had a doctor's appointment this evening and it looks like she's going to go early. This is probably the last picture she'll take pregnant. I'm posting these because I know Bryan's Mom reads my blog and she loves seeing pictures of Liz pregnant. I honestly think she looks better than any other pregnant person I've ever seen although she begs to differ.

So I have to be ready at a moment's notice to get in the car and go to New York. That sounds easy enough except for the fact that something happened with my back and I'm in excruciating pain to the point of not being able to sleep at all. I just can't find a position where I'm not in pain. And this pain is different from the pain I had before with my disc problems. It's more of a burning, throbbing pain on the outside of my leg from the top to the bottom. If it's not better by tomorrow, I'm going to have to go to the emergency room to see what it is.

I had my 2000th visitor to my blog this weekend and I'll write about that in my next entry. It's just so hard to do some creative writing when you're in pain. I have so much I want to write about but it will just have to wait. I especially want to tell you all about my cashing in of my Mother's Day present from my son-in-law.....our playing in a poker tournament together. I'll be back soon with this and other stories.