A Year Ago Today

It was a year ago today, October 17,2007, that we lost one of the most special people in my family......my cousin Madelyn. She passed away after a five year long battle with cancer and I would be remiss in not writing about her today.

Madelyn was the oldest of the girl cousins in my family, even though she was only 62 when she died. There were seven of us all born to the "Flay" girls....Viola, Dorothy, Madelyn and Margie. Madelyn was Viola's daughter and, as the oldest of us cousins, was really the matriarch of our family. It was Madelyn who organized everything and it was Madelyn who got everyone together. A year before she passed away, I had invited all of my cousins (male and female) to the shore for a fall weekend. This was the last time we would all be together. As I look back on that weekend, it was probably one of the most special times I've ever shared with the people I love. I'm so glad we got that opportunity for "one last good time." From those of us sitting in this picture, Madelyn is the fifth from the left.

I remember Madelyn being very tired that weekend but she always rallied and was right there with all of us cooking and playing games. The weather that weekend (November) was so beautiful and we even got to sit on the beach for a few hours. If there was one thing Madelyn loved, it was the beach. A few months before her passing, her four beautiful daughters, along with Madelyn's sister Debbie, took her on a vacation to the Bahamas. It was a girls' only vacation and all of the pictures show Madelyn looking in the best of health. It would be only a few months after that when she started to lose her battle.

She was, by far, one of the nicest and warmest people I have ever known. She was the female equivalent of my father.....always happy, always caring, always Madelyn. When I was at her funeral, her daughters wrote something about her in the Church booklet they handed out. I'd like to rewrite that here because I couldn't have said it better myself.

"Mere words could never justly describe the absolute wonder of being her daughters. Even the most seasoned writer could not detail the magical experience of walking through her front door, at any age, to be enveloped in the warmth of her ever-present smile and her loving arms. To us, home has always been where Mommy is.

Imagine, if you will, being raised by a woman who never raises her voice, who is never unhappy, who never lets her worries show... a woman who always encourages and never criticizes, who always puts you first and herself a distant last...a woman who will stay up all night to perfect a costume, to type a paper or to hold a hand and who, the very next morning, will still be your sunshine. Imagine the feeling of being raised by this woman, then multiply it by a hundred. Still, you are not even close.

Suffice it to say that we are the luckiest of all, for we are blessed with the honor of calling this woman our Mom."

And, suffice it to say that I felt lucky as well to be related to someone as wonderful as Madelyn. Perhaps she's now St. Madelyn in heaven because she certainly was a saint to all of us here on earth. We miss you so much!!!!

I'd like to share two other pictures with you. Since Madelyn's four girls were very young, each year she would include their picture on the front of her Christmas card. Once they were all married and had children of their own, she would take a picture of her and Mike with all their grandchildren. These were the last two I received. This is something I'll miss the most.

When I think of all the things I feel are unfair in this world, this is at the top of my list....that all of these beautiful grandchildren won't get to spend time with their wonderful grandmother.